Alexander Hamilton’s Salacious Sex Scandal (feat. Lin-Manuel Miranda) – Drunk History
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Alexander Hamilton’s Salacious Sex Scandal (feat. Lin-Manuel Miranda) – Drunk History


Pretty drunk.
[laughs] – You feel okay? – I’m giggly and there’s gaps
in my memory. [laughs] – That’s all right.
– Already. – Okay, so, uh,
let’s get back. – So, Yorktown.We won!Well, now we’ve gotta
form a country.
Um, they all ask him, hey, come be a part of
the Constitutional Convention.So we’re figuring out howthe American system
is gonna work.
The Constitutional Convention:this is the room
where they’re deciding
what the shape of our
government should be.
They’re hashing it out.And Hamilton speaks
for six hours.
But some of the things he
pitched would haunt him
the rest of his career.He pitched
maybe president for life?[whispering] Ooh, he’s secretly
a monarchist.
Maybe, uh, we inherit…positions.[whispering]
Bullshit. That’s terrible.
This guy just wants
to bring back the British.
Those whispers are from
the perspectives of, um, people who
don’t like him.Um, but anyway, um, we adopt
the system that we adopt.
And Hamilton becomes
its most ardent defender.
So– Trying to find the straightest
line through this story. So Hamilton has an affair.Um, while he’s
the treasury secretary,
he carries on this affair with
a woman named Maria Reynolds.
Her husband shows up.He’s like, yo, uh,
that’s my wife.
I’m happy to, like,
keep it on the low,
but you have to pay me.Gets basically extorted
for about $1,000.
James Reynolds, the husband
who was extorting him, gets arrested on some
other bullshit.While he’s trying to
weasel his way out of it,
he says, I’ve got dirt
on Alexander Hamilton.
Everyone goes,
really?
Hamilton, uh, and–
has been embezzling.
And he sort of says
all this shit about Hamilton.Um, and so three guys
go to confront Hamilton
on these charges.One of the dudes was future
president James Monroe.
And they went, yo, Hamilton,we know what you did,
you know what you did.
Check out these checks
to James Reynolds.
What’s up?
And they accuse him
of embezzling funds.And Hamilton goes,
no, no, no.
I was just [bleep] this lady,and her husband
was hitting me up for money.
I didn’t touch American money,and I have all kinds of proof.And he, like, vomits information
all over them.Oh, wow, that was more
than we needed to hear.
And we’re good, thanks.The info about the affair
gets somehow miraculously
printed in the paper.Hamilton is not a great dude.I know you think he’s great
’cause he’s a war vet,
and he’s
the Treasury Secretary,
but you’re gonna learn the
truth real soon.
And Hamilton gets this
and he goes to James Monroe,
[whispering]
what the [bleep]?
Like, I told you that in
secret.
And James Monroe’s like,it wasn’t secret
and it wasn’t me.
Wasn’t me who–who, uh,
published it.
Mother[bleep]!I told three people
about this
and you’re the one
who was taking notes,
so I know it came from you.Like…fess up.[bleep] you.
[bleep] you.
So Hamilton, over sharer,
writes the Reynolds Pamphlet. The whole thing reads like
a Dear Penthouse letter. Like, dear America,I never thought this would
happen to me.
But one day,
this ripped bodice woman
showed up at my door,
saying,
oh, my husband’s beating me,
left me alone
and I need money
and I need help.
You are a man of honor.
Can you help me?
Hamilton’s like,
I could give her money
or I could [bleep] herand either one would be
acceptable.
The–the Reynolds Pamphlet
is like Dick 101.
And, by the way,
he sent this to his friends.Being like, hey,
I think I’m gonna publish this.
And everyone was like,hey, bro, I don’t think
this is a good idea
to publish this.Like, maybe your wife
and your seven children
would not love it
if you published this.
And Hamilton’s like,
well, I mean, like,
I got accused of embezzling.And, like,
I can’t let that stand.
Maybe the, like,
marital infidelity trumps that?
I know it doesn’t
in your head,
but to everyone else
in the world it does.
Um, and he’s like, no,
I can’t let that shit stand.
And Hamilton goes back
to James Monroe
and–and now Hamilton’s like,well, it’s all out in the open.um, and if you still wanna
settle this,
because I know you’re the one
who leaked it.
Um, Monroe’s like,
well, I didn’t leak it,
but if you wanna, like, fight,
like, let’s do this.
And so they meet face to face.And Monroe goes,
all right, you’re mad at me
because of this,
this, and this.
And Hamilton goes,
let’s start at the beginning.
And lists, like, the first time
they met. [laughs] He lists the details
of the entire meeting,as Monroe gets more and more
impatient.
Monroe’s like, I know all this,
I know all this.
I know all this.Hamilton’s like,
you interrupted me.
I have to start again.And Monroe’s getting
angrier and angrier,
until they’re finally
pulled apart. ‘Cause they’re about to, like,
punch each other in the face.So Monroe goes to his homey,
Aaron Burr.
And goes, yo,
you know Hamilton,
will you tell him–this is so, like,
high school gossip.He goes,
will you tell Hamilton
that if he’s challenging me
to a duel, I accept.
But if he’s not, I wasn’t
challenging him to a duel.
And Burr goes
over to Hamilton, like,
James Monroe told me
to tell you
that if you’re challenging him,
he accepts,
but if you weren’t
challenging him,
he doesn’t really
wanna go into a duel.
Uh, and Burr
squashes the duel.Burr’s like,
duels are stupid.
And you both should just,
like shut up.
And it’s over.And Hamilton told everyone
everything, anyway.
So there’s no point in
you shooting at each other.
[cell phone beeps]
Sorry, I forgot
to put my phone on vibrate.– Yeah, okay.– Uh-oh, Questlove’s–
– Questlove? – Texting me. “You did ‘Drunk History’?” What? How did Questlove
find out? – Oh, here we go.– Yo!
– Questlove!– Yo! [laughs][both laugh]– Look at this.
– This is the best shit ever!
I cannot wait
for this episode.
My girl and I got together
based on our love
for “Drunk History.”– You see the effect you have?
– Well– I love you both. – ♪ History has its eyes
on you ♪ – Yes.
– This is awesome!
– Cheers.
– Bye, Questo.

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