Honest Government Ad | Anti Encryption Law
Articles,  Blog

Honest Government Ad | Anti Encryption Law


Hello I’m from the Australien Government Do you have something to hide? Nah, just kidding We’re not some fascist regime! Ha-ha-ha Seriously though, do you? Unfortunately encryption makes it
hard for us to spy on you these days so just to make sure, we’re introducing
yet another law to expand the surveillance state Introducing the Assistance & Access Bill –
or Ass Access for short Relax, despite how it sounds we’re not
trying to access your data through your backdoor We’re just after the keys to your front door Yup, Ass Access will force tech
companies to do our dirty work for us for example, by making them insert
a little “secret sauce” in their apps which lets us access your device,
once you download the latest “update” And if they refuse, we’ll fine the shit out of them Ass Access. It doesn’t break encryption,
only your trust in your favourite apps To bring you Ass Access, we’ve taken the UK’s fascist spying law and made it even more fascist by removing any need for judicial oversight But don’t worry, we promise to only spy
on you if “reasonable and proportionate” And you know you can trust us, we’re the
same c**ts who doxxed a welfare recipient for criticising us… who are prosecuting
a whistleblower for exposing our misconduct who throw kids in concentration camps
for seeking asylum and prosecute the journalists who report on them and who gave half a billion of your
tax dollars to a foundation full of our friends… So of course you can count on us to
be “reasonableand proportionate”. And if we’re not, well… you’ll never hear about it
coz we’ve also introduced a 10 year jail sentence for any Snowden-wannabies
who disclose our abuse of Ass Access ASS ACCESS! Brought to you by Australia – where the laws
of dickheads can’t trump the laws of maths but they can trample human rights Which is why to test this shitfuckery, we chose Australia the weakest of the Five Eyes alliance thanks to our lack of a Federal Bill of Rights So international data requests will be
funnelled through us compromising not just Aussies,
but all of you fuckers too You’re welcome We’d love to know what you think of Ass
Access. So we’ve set up a public submission system where, for a limited time, you can
protest our next step towards a fucked up dystopia Australian Government.
Relax, we’re not after your dickpicks just the last shreds of your civil liberties Authorised by the Department of Home Au Pairs

100 Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *